Friday, September 3, 2010

On my own, Even less in control over my life.

So I have moved out of my house and landed a full time position at the job I love! God has given me everything i have asked for in spades. I have been blessed with an amazing love and just as amazing friends. We are all moving though different experiences in our life but we are all there to support each other in the good and bad in our lives. I am lokoing at my relationship with God and knowing I need guidance and instead of just shrugging it off I am taking the initiative to do something about it-this is growth.

Life couldn't get any better. Or could it?
I am fighting with my boyfriend's brother and girlfriend and even if i now know that a resolution will not come until they are ready to deal with us and that the lack of a resolution is not my fault- its hard to let go and let God.
Its hard knowing that there is a situation that needs repair and there is nothing i can do about it - that its not my place to even try. Sometimes all we can do is pray.

As simple as that seems as an answer it is the hardest one to act on. It feels like I are doing nothing when really I am doing everything that is important. It sometimes seems like I don't know where to start or what do ask for or thank Him for. Everything seems a little vague. Maybe sometimes all He wants is us to contemplate this in is presence, to sit there and simply adore all that He is and He had done.

I think i jut need some time with him. Uninterrupted, no time lines. I need to learn to listen.

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